I was really trying to think of something for today that was light-hearted and fun. I think I'm getting sick, so today was a very lax day and I didn't accomplish much. I started Google-ing 'New Year's resolutions' and they were all about losing weight, exercising, quitting smoking or drinking, or keeping in contact.  None of these are that interesting and/or I'm already doing them.

Then I found this: http://gawker.com/5871881/pop-culture-new-years-resolutions-for-2012

I like this idea; however, none of them are really attainable in a day.  This prompted me to think of something equally ridiculous and silly.

So, resolution Twenty-nine: enter a sweepstake. A couple of years ago, I spent the better part of a summer entering sweepstakes and never won a thing. Wouldn't it be exciting if this is when and how I finally did?

Today I entered for a vacation, an iPad, and a Macbook Air.

Happy January and see you next month.

Day Twenty-eight

E.T. phone home....

Yes, another resolution about contact. It's really important that we keep in touch with the people in our lives that we love. That said,

Resolution 28: contact Margaret et. al (Kiyomi and Ila) Today is Migg's birthday and she is in town, so it is a little bit of a freebie.

P.S. Yoga was phenomenal today.

Day Twenty-Seven

Today has been a long, hard day. The only thing I can muster accomplishing at 9:00pm is this:

Day 27: don't count calories.

I try to maintain some perspective and control over what I consume by counting calories.  It keeps me in check and aware of what I put in my body...good and bad.  Sometimes though, I can get a little obsessed...and these are the days when I just need to let go...

I wasn't really concerned about that today, but I did scarf down a piece and a half of pumpkin pie, potato chips, Indian food, and other various high caloric/fatty foods...but I don't want to feel guilty about it....and adding all those numbers will do just that.  So, No Thank You, today. I deserved that pumpkin pie (whatever that means) and even though my stomach hurts now, that was good Indian food I had for dinner.

So maybe even more than 'don't count calories', today should be about honoring the choices I made. I made some selfish choices, some poor choices (possibly), some excellent choices, and some questionable choices...but at the end of it all...I did what I did and there is no use dwelling.

Tomorrow is a new day and tomorrow I go to yogaaaahhhhhhh......

Day Twenty-six

Keep in touch!

Resolution 26: contact Medine.

Day Twenty-five

Keep in touch. We all need to do it more.

Resolution twenty-five: Contact Sam Day.

He is a special guy to us.

Day Twenty-four

I'm running out of ideas....

A few summers ago, in an effort to find some peace of mind about where I was in my life, I downloaded a iGoogle app: Affirmation a Day. I think I was searching for some mental guidance...some daily words of wisdom to keep me sane. Unfortunately, most of them were kind of lame and I found little inspiration.

Then I found yoga. It was just what I was looking for: ideas to guide my actions and thoughts especially when I am feeling low.  I guess this is why some people go to church. Anyway, I would like to make a point to ascribe to some words of wisdom, regardless of where they originate.

So, Resolution twenty-four: find a Mantra for the day.

Today, it came from my exercise class at the gym, which is coincidentally taught by my yoga teacher:

Trust that you know what you need.

This applies to all levels of my life lately.  I know when I need rest, I know when I need to run my ass off, I know when I need to clear my mind by standing at the copy machine, I know when I need to very blunt with a 9 year old...and yet I find myself questioning each decision.

Not today.

Day Twenty-three

Resolution twenty-three: learn something new.

My resource? Wikipedia. I love Wikipedia. They have a featured article each day and a random article picker. Knowledge at your fingertips! Oh, the internet..

Today I'm doing the featured article, which is about Thurisid, the king of the Gepids. That is all I know so far. 

Happy learning. 

Day Twenty-two

Resolutions twenty-two: Save money for your dream house.

We have been house hunting a lot lately but are in the unfortunate position of not really being able to afford anything. This is mostly because we do not have any savings.  We had some a while back, but we blew it on our trip to Belgium and paying off credit cards. Not bad ways to spend money, but it certainly put us back a couple of years.  About a year ago, we began putting a little bit of money back into savings in each month. But I did the math (damn you numbers that never lie!) and it would take us about five years to save just the bare minimum of a down payment, but really about a third of what we'd need. That is crazy!  So I decided I wanted to start putting more in each month but was afraid to commit to a number to be withdrawn-and redirected-at the same time each month. What if we don't have that number one month?

So this morning I realized that instead of committing to a number, I can commit to a day.  This will force me(us) to pad our nest on a regular basis, but this can be done as best fits our budget. Not a bad plan, me thinks.

Today is my mom's birthday. I was also trying to think of something surrounding her, or mothers, or family to make as a resolution for today. Well, considering how much I moved as a child, I think that saving money so that I can establish my home, a place, roots, is a wonderful gift to give to my childhood self...and any future offspring that may decide to show up.

our house.

Day Twenty-one

I love music. Love. Love. Love. 

However, I'm a little stubborn when it comes to discovering new bands .  It takes me a while to acclimate to a new sound, and now that I don't drive around with my friends for fun, frantically searching for a soundtrack to our Friday night, I don't spend a lot of time seeking out new tunes.  In fact, my dear friend Scott is my only glimpse into anything current and even he has all but abandoned the task.  

My CD collection is tired. I have started occasionally perusing music blogs , but there is so much out there, and it is quite a time commitment filtering through so many sounds, opinions, and inaccurate descriptions.  Is it too much to ask to have really good music picked out for me that I will love right away and then possibly get to see live in an intimate venue in the very near future? 

Resolution twenty-one: find new music. 

Here is what I discovered today. Two very different sounds, each speaking to a different auditory aesthetic (which I'm not sure is even a thing.)

Adventure Galley: Addict

and 

Mausi: Sol

Day Twenty

Screens.
I feel as though my life has been all about screens these last few weeks. I've been in front of a computer for work, I've been using my iPod touch as an ongoing To Do list, and when I relax, I relax in front of a screen...the television or my laptop...sometimes both at the same time!

Resolution Twenty: veg, relax, but most importantly, UNPLUG. I already took sometime to work on the puzzle in the living room and later, Jesse and I are going to play Scrabble. Thanks to my friend Alex for inspiring that!

Aaaaaaah.....

Day Nineteen

Oh my. Today I didn't have time to fart, let alone think about or act on a resolution....
So instead I will commit to do something I did do today, once a month for the rest of the year: make dinner.  I'm expanding my cooking repertoire.  I can make risotto and cheesecake, however both are time consuming and don't have much nutritional value...so I don't really want to make them.  I can also make potato leek soup, but I'm the only one who likes that.  I recently learned one easy dish that is a great quick dinner. Unfortunately, Jesse is not crazy about. It is too healthy for him! But that is what we did tonight, because he didn't want to cook and I have to start eating out less.

Anyway, Resolution nineteen: make a meal.

Lets start building some insurance against starvation when microwaves don't exist.

Day Eighteen

Zumba!!!

I did a class for the first time today! I have always secretly wished I was a dancer. I want to be beautiful and graceful on my big ol' feet. I want my movements to always be fluid and deliberate. The only time I ever feel that way is in yoga.

So, anyway, maybe I will tap into that bit of Latina and get my (non)hips and (non)booty groovin' if I practice a little more often.

Resolution Eighteen: Dance it like you got it. You go girl.

Day Seventeen

Contact.  Definitely being better about staying in touch with those I love has always been something I intend to do...but then don't.

First on the list: my brother. His birthday is the 17th (of June) so that will help me remember!

Resolution Seventeen: "call your brother!" - in my best naggy-mom voice.

Day Sixteen

Beginning Friday evening, I had been suffering from horrible stomach pain until last night. It felt like gas pain, but by hour 36 I started to worry that it was something worse. Now, internet research when you're not feeling well is never a good idea, but I was scanning articles about gas persistent stomach pain, to see what horrible disease I may actually have contracted.  Most explanations came back to diet.  However, this ranges from greasy and fatty foods to specific intolerances, such as dairy or wheat.

Well, this morning I feel much better, but I know that a large part of my discomfort came from weeks of eating out, weeks of poor eating, and weeks of sitting on my ass.  This combined with a whole-lotta Mexican food on Friday night, made this weekend rough on the belly.

It's time to say goodbye to the holiday indulgences and excuses to not cook dinner at home. I need to be a little more disciplined about what I put in my body. In that vein,

Resolution sixteen: gluten-free for a day.

I don't want to go nuts about the gluten-free/Celiac's disease craze, but I know I feel better when I eliminate certain foods from my diet. So, for at least a day, maybe my poor digestive tract will get some relief.

Gluten-Free Songs  

Day Fifteen

Ten years is a long time. J. and I have been together for ten years and I often reflect on how this relationship shaped me, changed me, and where it will go from here.  There is undeniable comfort in knowing that someone has seen the good, the bad, the ugly, and the mean, and yet manages to say "I love you" every time he gets off the phone.

Among the many things I worry about, one is that I don't do enough nice things for J., just for the sake of being nice. As elements of a relationship grow stale - like, maybe I won't shave my legs for a month - the small niceties that we were so eager to perform in the throws of young love, should not be lost. I have to work on that. Sometimes I hear myself nagging and I have this horrible vision of us in the future...as Fred and Ethel.

So, the fifteenth (of April) is Jesse's birthday.

Resolution fifteen: do something nice for Jesse.

Today I let him sleep all day.  Does that not seem nice? Well, after three days of him promising we'd hang out together for the entire day, and consequently not...a guilt free, lazy, veg-fest was the best I could do.

Day Fourteen

I have been saying this for years....years!...and I never do it: I want to wear high heels more often.

I love getting dressed up, but the problem is I have nowhere to go. I also really enjoy jeans and a t-shirt.  I enjoy not putting so much effort into how I look. Oh man, but when there is a reason to, it is so much fun.

So, since it is the fourteenth, the date of my birth, I will give myself this treat:

Resolution fourteen: wear those heels for the hell of it.

Lucky me, I'm invited to a party tonight!

Day Thirteen

Spooky. Friday the 13th!

I'd like to learn a new language. I think I'm going to start with French. 

Resolution thirteen: say it in a new way! 

C'est magnifique!

(This is amazing!)

I figure if I ever go to Paris, this will be a good phrase to know

Day Twelve

Resolution twelve: 100 situps!

Whoo hoo! I have been sedentary for the last two weeks. Time to strengthen that core.

Day Eleven

Guess the tune.

Well I'm proud to be a vegetarian,
cause at least I am meat free.
And I'll know that no animals died,
or were sacrificed for me.

Resolution: Do it like a vegetarian.

I have, for a while now, really wanted to be a vegetarian. I can't seem to let go of chicken or fish. Considering the red-meat lovin' country we live in, I guess that isn't too bad, but I would still feel better about not eating any animals.

I actually probably go through many of my days unconsciously eating vegetarian, but at least on this day I will be deliberate and aware.

Day Ten

Resolution ten: take more pictures.

I can't seem to enroll myself in a photography class. I take a lot of pictures, but many of them of are of my dogs or my students.  Not really photography material, as no one but me really cares.

So, I'd like to develop my skills and spend more time exploring this hobby.

Here are today's (Yes, there is a dog photo. I couldn't help myself.)

bathroom floor

oskar hands

to do matrix

Day Nine

I was trying to come up with a theme for today's resolution. I had a hard time focusing since I have so much on my mind. Work stuff. Personal stuff. The added pressure of coming up with a resolution for the day was bumming me out.

Then I went to yoga. I found myself frantically making lists of what I needed to do when I got home and planning how I was going to use my time tomorrow and the next day. I quickly realized that that is not what yoga is about and frankly, I was freaking myself out.

I needed to let go.

So I did. I released into the wonderful bliss that is yoga. Everytime my mind wandered back to work, I focused harder on opening my hips and spreading my toes. It was absolutely divine.

With that, Resolution #9: Release.  

Each month, that release may be a little different, but today, releasing to my body, endorphins, muscles, and my breath was exactly what I needed.

Namaste.

Day Eight

Resolution eight: nail care.

Okay, I am notorious for letting my nail polish hang. For example, I got a pedicure for my birthday....in July....and my toenails are bare except for a small sample of the dark blue I had painted on six months ago. I just can't find the time to care.  The thing is, I like have nicely painted nails, toe or hand. I struggle with having others do it, "pampering" in that manner is extremely unnatural for me, yet I am not disciplined, or patient, enough to take care of it myself.

Also, Jesse hates the smell of nail polish, which makes careful timing a factor in all of this.

Anyway, so today I took off an old coat of stained pinkish/purple nonsense, filed my nails so hopefully they will continue to grow, and then painted a nice base coat. I didn't get to my toes though. Maybe next month.

Day Seven

Resolution Seven: cross off seven items from my To Do list.

It is the end of the semester, so this time of year everything gets backed up.  I have only been back to work for four days and already my kitchen looks like a war zone, it appears as though somebody has ransacked the house because clothes are everywhere, and I can't seem to find a clean bra - or any bra for that matter.

Inevitably, a lot gets pushed to the back burner and the back burner items get shoved behind the stove.  This is usually when I begin compiling a "Things to do over the summer" list.

Not today! I'm going to cross off seven of those pesky tasks that buzz in my head all night long and feed my eye twitch.

So far I have:

1. gone to yoga
2. worked on narratives
3. picked up dog food
4. showered and shaved my legs (Yes, I even shower with less frequency. It is gross.)
5. charged my cell phone

I plan to:

do at least one round of dishes
complete one load of laundry

I might even try to pay some bills.

Day Six

Resolution six: learn a new word.

I have often worried that have a limited vocabulary.  Well, speaking vocabulary anyway. I know the meaning of a lot of words, but rarely use them. According to Dictionary.com, today's word of the day is sprat.

I'm off to go work with a bunch of little sprats right now.

Day Five

Fifth resolution: eat five different color fruits and veggies.

This is something we are all supposed to do everyday. I think I average 2-3, usually in fruit form. The real challenge is to make it at least three of those colors vegetables.

In honor of the fifth day, I will do it at least once a month.

Have a colorful, fiber-filled day!

Day Four

Resolution four: wash car.

Yup.
I have a nice ride right now, clean inside and out.
I think this will be an excellent mentality with which to begin each month.

The drive through car wash is fun too.

Day Three

Resolution Three: No scale.

I'm ashamed to admit that I'm a little bit obsessed with the scale. It actually is not as bad as it once was, mostly because I have figured out my bodies cycle of retaining water weight or putting on vacation weight, and then how long before it - more or less - works itself off.  However, when it is just sitting there...next to the sink as I wash my hands...all shiny and red and cute...it can be so tempting to just hop on and check in.

This holiday season I really made an effort to maintain a balance between healthy eating and consistent exercise with allowing myself to partake in festivities that encourage some indulgence. It was really lovely actually....but that extra poundage came with it. The only way to not worry about it, for me, is to not let the scale get involved. I had a nice run today and Pilates tomorrow: aint no scale gonna bring me down. 


While this resolution is partially in response to the holiday season, it is certainly an action - or non action rather - worth revisiting each month. Maybe by the end of the year, I'll get rid of the damn thing.

Day Two

Resolution #2: Clean out car.

This means the inside not the outside...I might be saving that for another day.  I call my car an 'educator' car. That means the back seat and trunk are filled with books, papers, pens, and art supplies.  Well, I happen to be an educator who is turning into a bit of a gym rat, so I also have socks, shirts, sneakers, and towels.  Um, I'm also an educator/gym rat who is finicky when it comes to temperature, as I get cold very easily, so I also have a nice collection of sweaters, mittens, beanies, and scarves.

 Notice the old lottery ticket, leaves, and pen on the ground?

 Ah yes, and then this charming display....

This is a bit harder to see, but old water bottles and pay stubs are on the floor here.


On a regular basis, it gets to a point where either the entire backseat is full or the entire floor of the backseat is full of the above mentioned...stuff.  As I get into the car, I throw everything in the passenger seat. As other people get into the car, I throw everything on the back seat. When the dogs get into the car, it all goes on the floor.  And so is the lovely cycle of 'All My Shit'.






A good hour or so later, it was CLEAN! I did find some treasures once I cleared everything out: old chips and popcorn, more pens(!), flyers for various events I never attended, lots of bobby pins, and $0.27.


What I think will be most amusing about this project is that over the course of the next twelve months, I will  revisit the various tasks, concerns, and dreams I was mulling over at the beginning of the year.  Who knows how concerned I'll be with cleaning my car in five months, but when the 2nd rolls around each time, I will be reminded of my initial traveling collection of paper, cloth, and plastic and the glorious months spent accumulating it all.

Day One

Ah, January. A new month, a fresh start to a new year. This is the time when we are encouraged to make goals, resolutions, and commitments. In years past, I have deliberately not made resolutions for a variety of reasons. For one, a year is a long time to commit to something. Sure it feels manageable when brainstorming all the possibilities or, perhaps more likely, regretting the last two months of seasonal indulgence; but attempting to adhere to some vague intention for a whole year, such "I'll be healthier", "I'll exercise more", or "I'll drink less", is so arbitrary that it seems to me  you are setting yourself up for failure.  The pessimist in me is not about New Year's Resolutions. The irony in all this, obviously, is that I have essentially set into motion mini-resolutions each month.  Now a month is more realistic, for me anyway, but for some people a week or even a day is more their speed. Anyone ever try to quit smoking? That process starts as a new commitment every five to thirty minutes.  So clearly, the optimist in me is about realistic goals: spans of time that allow you to succeed, hopefully harnessing the thrill of success to push you forward to your next goal.

That said, and as you know, there a lot of things I am constantly telling myself I need to start, or do more often, or not do as much, or not stress out about, etc, etc, etc. This happens at all times of the year, however similar to New Years, usually in response to some recent experience.  This ranges from stuffing my face with the better part of a pizza and then vowing to become a raw foodist, to watching the Olympics and thus declaring that I am finally going to learn how to-and then become-a figure skater or gymnast.  Would you be surprised to hear that I have never done either of those things?

I had what I thought was going to be this month's project picked out a while ago. I had been mulling over the various ways I could execute it and how to share my journey in the process.  Then, yesterday I was reading a friend's blog (http://kerryluvcat.tumblr.com/) and I was quite struck by her method and manner of goal setting.  She is not only incredibly organized with her goals, but also amazingly committed to them, which really means, to herself. I was so moved...and inspired. I realized I've been dwelling a bit on 'being a better person' which has caused me become a bit of a Debbie Downer. I think maybe I have been feeling both sorry for myself and too hard on myself and - quite frankly - it is starting to irritate me. So this is my sassy "Goodbye!" to that (and the previous project idea) and a fabulous "Hello!" to something totally different.

In an effort to combine my love of realistic goals and the embrace the spirit of the New Year I am resolving to making 29 New Year's Resolutions. (Wha?) Each day I will pick one thing I want to accomplish and commit to accomplishing that same thing on the same day of each month for the rest of the year. For example, if Day One is 'Clean the Toilet' (it is not) then on the first of each month, I will clean the toilet. The idea being, that all those little things I tell myself I want to try or do, I can commit to on a regular basis for a small, manageable amount of time. My intent is for this to be fun.  The psychotic-anal-retentive in me needs to organize and plan such fun I guess.

Day one you ask?

A Self Portrait. I'm turning 30 this year, I'm trying to be okay with that.

I didn't want to let women down. One of the stereotypes I see breaking is aging and older women not being beautiful. 
Annie Leibovitz

Happy January!